ps i'm pretty sure i was blacked out when we hooked up? good thing i was w. you and not an actual diddler or an organ harvester
Hahaha. Shut up you were blacked out my ass. U were str8 mixin it up with urs truly like it was ur J-O-B
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Nothing is worse than puking naked in front of strangers
so the sex was amazing up until the point where she said "wow, you're even better than your dad!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...she's taking her top off and singing songs from Anastasia. I swear to God were solumates.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
Just had sex with a girl from Italy. The only english she knew was Obama campaign slogans. Her screaming, "Yes we can!" as I was railing her not only turned me on but allowed my neighbors to know it was consentual.
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Dude... the time we have in life to be young and trivial is so incredibly short. I think we should drink tonight.
Accent: check. Hot body: check. 8" dick: check. Feeds me biscuits in bed after rampant sex: check. Should I continue with my "Why I'm not coming back to the States" List?
woke up to find a case of beer in the oven and a random puppy in the house...guess i had a party last night?
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