I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Put your dick on his face to wake him up, dont worry its fine.
Question. Will thrown up fruit loops go down the shower drain?
I have the money I owe you for auctioning off your black thongs. Best 30 bucks ever spent
I'll be a little late, "getting ready for the party" turned into "smoking a bowl and doing lines in my room for an hour and a half." But I'm on my way now. With coke. And weed.
Found a single cinnamon toast crunch between my butt cheeks. We did work last night
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
So last night I taught an old homeless dude to respond to "Blue" so I could shout your my boy Blue at the party
She was into my hawaiian shirt and id never made out with a dinosaur... I feel like it worked out for everyone
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
I'm too over dressed and drunk for this emergency vets office
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
We were on the beach when you spilled sand in the bottle and said "relax it's vodka, it'll disinfect itself"
I was in line at Panera when I got the pic you sent to your coworker. I just showed your vag to a soccer mom. The vibrator was a nice touch.
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