weddingsv make me drug and hornr
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
maybe i would like her more if 99% of her sentences didn't start with "yesterday when i was reading twilight..."
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Watching this movie and saying "drink every time you see an animal" was a bad idea...circle of life...holy crap
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
I went up to get a drink from the hotel room. And ended up getting arrested in the lobby. Spring break has not been forgiving this year.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
I can feel my ovaries exploding thinking about them.
One time she made a chronological chart for the guys she has given blow jobs to, I shit you not.
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
I haven't been sober in 4 days.
Then be sober
No.
I feel like I should remember what we did after leaving the party because apparently a llama was involved, but all I can manage is the part where I asked you to cuff my ankle to the bed so I wouldn't backflip away.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
I haven't been drunk for four days and just realized I haven't taken a shit for three. This can't be healthy.
Which part?
Randomize
