Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
We just took the batteries out of the fire alarm to play the breathalyzer game. I love college.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dont judge me. He may have been ugly but he was INCREDIBLE. He's like the Susan Boyle of sex.
I'll be honest. I knew what I was getting into. I'm not proud, but I'll be damned if I'm ashamed. 6 month draught is over. That's justice.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
At least be KIND OF sobering up before you text me, I've told you before I don't speak vodka unless I've been drinking it with you.
PS WHY wasn't I drinking it with you? Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
What does it mean when the government shuts down and your boyfriends wife wants a divorce ON YOUR BIRTHDAY?
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
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