Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
Vegas is awesome. Its like you have a kentucky accent girls automatically assume you don't have herpes.
Yes, I did know where her mouth had been, but frankly I think it was a lesson you needed to learn.
Come outside. The vendor wants to go out strong tonight! Russian hooker interviews. Don't ask. We leave in 3 minutes.
youre just mad because i have donuts and im beautiful
Come down. Bring Jorts. We're getting ready for this tricycle race like champions.
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
That hot guy i showed you guessed my exact bra size. I want to have his tan babies.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
Like I'm not tryna become president or marry a doctor or some shit here, like one level above garbage is all I'm asking for
Nothing says "I'm sorry for shitting in your bed" like an Olive Garden gift card
For now I'm a single mom monday-thursday and a drunk looking for dick the rest of the week
This is a life or shit situation. Grab me toilet paper asap. This bathroom is fucking out. This is not a test. This an actual emergency and I am not joking.
Btw you guys passed out eating DP dough and watching Pocahontas... on a monday
it was stoner heaven..
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