i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
There's nothing worse than waking up naked on the beach covered in sand and a family walking by.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
We were debating whether rain water is clean enough to drink. I won when he started throwing up.
I need to pack up my vagina and leave. We only do bad things together.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
being single and having a boyfriend 300 miles away is eerily similar. never skipped a beat eating hot wings in my bed with no pants or masturbating every day.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
Should I be concerned that the new guy I'm seeing just referred to my stealing a sailboat in college while drunk as "wholesome"?
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
its 11:20. i'm drunk in class flying paper airplanes for my final. what the fuck is my college experience right now?
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
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