this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
I can't find my underwear or one of my shoes but he baked me cookies for breakfast.
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Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
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Have you ever been so high that you felt like corduroy? I'm at that level.
When he mumbled "I can't feel my legs," proceeded to stand, fall over, and just lay there I knew I'd given great head...
Quick I need a sexy way to say "suck your balls"
So, I feel bad. I just told my husband I had sex with someone else while on a business trip. Today is his birthday. I'm kind of a dick.
We ran out of toilet paper so Ive been using coffee filters
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
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