But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
I really super glued a paper bow tie to my body last night. I need to do less drugs.
woke up this morning in the hall outside of my parents room with a sign taped to myself that said "im sorry"...
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
I can motorboat myself in this new push-up bra. I need to go out tonight.
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Btw. Being a stripper for a week without anyone knowing to pay off my school loan is no longer in my agenda.
Dude true life I died at the derby...I lost everyone I knew, went down a bourbon and mud slip and slide, lost my hat, fell off the roof of a porta potty, sprained my ankle and knee and then got arrested.
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
Just once I'd like to go out and not have to tell you to put your pants back on.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
In a meeting I sneezed and my tooth hit the floor. I don't think anyone noticed. I would still like to die now.
Randomize
