There is a girl getting fingered on my left, a middle aged drink man smoking a bong and two girls flashing the cameras in front of me. I'm in the middle trying to maintain my innocence.
she thought don quixote was a type of tequila.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
is year to celebrate how much I love you, I made a mosaic of your penis with conversation hearts. it's in your mailbox.\n\nHAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY TO YOU
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Wrapped in a blanket, just ate a whole party pizza. All my dreams are coming true and you don't even care.
Dropping acid was like seeing the whole world as a blank canvas to imagine anything I wanted.
And apparently all you wanted was to watch the sun explode and me take 60,000 dicks to the face.
Well, we won the drunk before noon contest!
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
If I take one more surprise finger up the ass this week there will be hell to pay.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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