one two three fourrrrnication!
he quoted cool runnings while we were having sex: feel the rythm,feel the rhyme, get on up, its bobsled time
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
answer the phone. i thought i was eating cheese but it was butter. i ate a lot of it.
No its cool, because I bought a handle of tequila earlier, in case things went south
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
Someone has big plans this weekend. Just went to throw away the trash and saw packaging for 3 different vibrators on the top of the stack
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
Will Smith has a direct hotline to my emotions
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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