There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
He was passed out on the floor holding a beer can, rolled over switched hands and never spilled a drop. We need to practice.
When you gave the girl your number the fat girl was like "take mine....here please take mine"
your ex girlfriend just barged in my house, drunk, mumbled something about "car strip", and put a huge hole in my drywall with her head.
All I remember is a very aggressive two-stepper who inadvertently made me give myself a black eye with my own beer
Yes she scared me. She had NIPPLE CLAMPS ATTACHED TO A STUN GUN.
Do you think next time you could control the yawn? Kind of a buzzkill to be mid-orgasm and see you yawning over there.
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
She showed up after 3 hours and proceded to make us all feel like resonable human beings. I dont know how she did it but she did it.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
It was a bad idea to take ecstasy with cats in the house. No animal likes being touched that much. Let me know how your eye feels tomorrow
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
Randomize