We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Barsexuality is the new black.
He finally admitted that he was drunk when I asked him how he got the rug burn on his chin and he replied "the worm contest"
My grandma just told me that she sharted, no I am not having fun in El Paso.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
They left me passes out in the food donation bin with an empty handle and a half eaten box of nutter butters
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
I need drugs. Hard drugs. Today. Not tomorrow. Today. Something relaxing.
Came so hard my ears popped. This lovely piece of news and pissin in my driveway brought to you by rum
Her instagram is literally selfies, cats, and guys she's fucked.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
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