I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Dude if it is possible to orgasm from shitting i think it just happened.
You told me to hold on because you had to barf like a dinosaur.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were trying to control your nosebleed while having someone hold your four loko while you drank it through a straw. all at the same time. that is commitment.
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
these past three weeks have been a real "fuck you" to my liver
Ughh I think I'll just sit here in the dark and wallow in self-pity while drinking wine and knitting scarves for my future cats.
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
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