Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
I was working er so they smashed a vodka bottle over dan's head so they'd have an excuse to visit
I would say a second date is not looking likely, I acciedentally bit his penis. it's still bleeding 43 minutes later.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
I am still sore from last night. I can't wait for you to meet my parents.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
if i don't get grease into my system pronto i will undoubtedly die
Let me know if you need some dick this weekend.
Between the BF being in town, partying at the Side Dick’s house tonight and two Tinder dates tomorrow I’ve got dick to spare!!
Randomize
