what if I'm pregnant?
smusmorshion
the fair has chocolate covered bacon...impossible is nothing.
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
he said that weed should be legal but that particular bong shouldn't be. i stared at a clock for an hour and a half after i ripped. so logically, i completely agree.
Those foam number one hands, are the BEST socks.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
I just want a pillowcase full of fast food so I can eat and sleep this hangover away
One day her vagina is just going to shrivel up and seal itself with it's self preservation mechanism
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
I'm going to give blood tomorrow. Prepare yourself for pictures and a cynical poem about the heart and its level of tangibility.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
I gave a handjob to the beat of uptown fuck last night
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
Randomize
