Wasted at the beach. Toasting underage, overdeveloped girls. God bless 'em.
I found the TV remote. It was in the washing machine along with the chicken wings you kept complaining to Domino's about that they 'never delivered'
We each get one free throw up cleaning, no questions asked.
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
Literally everyone in the bar was absolutely hammered out of their minds. I swear I even saw the bartender swigging jd when he thought no one was looking. And there was me thinking Britain was the booziest nation in the world.
Welcome to America. You're gonna love it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Sounds like it could have been the night you pulled out your love stump at the strip club.
I dunno if you guys are having weird sex or a most accurate bird sound contest but either way stop doin it
Copy that. Decided to shower with a beer in a glass bottle. Gotta stop the bleeding first. Be there is 20
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
the guy working the counter at the liquor store noticed i got my haircut and said it was pretty.....
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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