my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
I knew the night had taken a turn when we showed up and our flabongo was being chilled in the freezer.
Just pretend you're riding a unicorn through space. Thats how I deal with the stirrup situation at the gyno office.
Do you count doing $200 of coke off his dick until 6am as a successful rekindling of our relationship or...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
showering high made me realize that i should seriously reconsider my career path... id be a damn good hair shampooer & head massager
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Awkward, walking to my bootycall's hotel room and run into my dad leaving his. Just nodded to each other and went on our ways
All I want is to get shitfaced and fuck random strangers is that really to much to ask?
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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