Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
So I feel really bad about last night...can i give you a blow job and we call it even?
i just yelled "run, its godzirra!" to an asian kid who looked confused by the tornado alarm test
she had condoms in her med. cabinet - magnums -I don't think I'm tall enough for this ride
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he would probably call me "ma'am" when he's inside me. people love saying weird shit inside me.
Ur keys r in ur purse. ur purse is on the couch. ur cigs r on ur front seat. u drank all ur wine. mollie took ur jkt bc u cockblocked her. and in case anyone asks, the saints won 31-17.
I already wrote the apology to my liver. He knows whats up
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
its like a catch 22, sucks that you've stopped, but its like a vagina high five
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
But like now I know, men who are vegetarians are significantly worse in bed.
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
You should have just fucked me in the bathroom when you had a chance!
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