You were asking people if they could pee on you while you shotgunned beers
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
This flask doesn't match my outfit. I hope the gays don't mind.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
DON'T LET IAN EAT HIS PEANUT BUTTER!!!
Just remembered that I poured a whole bottle of tylenol in there. It's chunky. It's deadly.
I just tried to eat one of my ear plugs, thinking it was a cheese curl. I need it to be break RIGHT NOW.
all i could think about while he was eating me out was how pretty his eyelashes were
Hey man. We haven't met but my name is Ben. I threw up a bunch at your house last night. I heard you smoke though so I'll smoke you out anytime.
Which one of you fuckers thought itd be funny to see if the kitchen table can float.
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
This is worse than naked and afraid. This is drunk and confused.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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