We need to have an Itty-Bitty Titty Committee mtg somewhere in the range of 5 minutes to ASAP.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
you took a scissor and started screaming "I WANNA KNOW WHAT ITS LIKE TO BE BALD"
sorry for covering your dog in whipped cream. his bark made it sound like he wanted it.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
all a guy has to do is give me sprinkles and cookies and they can get me in bed
I mean I knew we were putting on quite a show but I didnt realize HOW good until I woke up and 4 people were passed out with their ears to the bedroom door.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Amazon.com "suggested" I buy both nipple clamps and opera gloves.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I wish we could all take a bath together. Not in a lesbian way. But in a relaxing drunk in the tub sort of way.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
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