But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
I have a sudden craving for National Treasure 2. THIS IS WHY DRUGS ARE AWESOME
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
I'm eating tomato paste and drinking banana juice that is expired. Can we please get groceries tonight?
I look at sleeping with him as a way to get up in the world. He will lead me on to bigger and better penises.
Hovering on the line between her being fuckable and me being too drunk to fuck. Life's juggling act in progress here.
It's called the eyeliner-blowjob correlation, read a science book bro
Wearing a french maid costume for Halloween sure did help me meet girls
Dude, they all thought you were gay.
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Randomize
