hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
We've finally become those guys who you'd see in middle school when you went to the park who are just stoned out of their minds sitting on the swings.
I knew we should have skipped class earlier, my lab partner is drunk from last night and making up his own experiments.
ok, just found out the kid i had random sex with in April was on wheel of fortune so i can really no longer say i regret that night
I was so drunk that I didn't realize he was staying at the Waldorf. I walk of shamed the Astoria, do you even know what this means?
Also, I don't remember opening my gifts from my family. It was cool when I woke up with a new ihome.
His response today determines what state my vagina will be in this weekend.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
He spent $1100 at a strip club. If I had that kind of disposable income, I'd make a cocaine sandcastle.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
She makes him look at her naked pics before she sends them to someone she's actually going to fuck. I think this makes him mayor of the friend zone.
if anyone knows where my shirt is please let me know and if you know why I don't have my own shirt please also let me know. also do any of you know why I'm missing a bra wire?
The only thing left on my Bucket List is getting fingered at an aquarium.
So I got this new job… ever been fucked in a corner office before?
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