I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
she is the kim kardashian of front butts
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
well, at the moment I'm sleeping in someone's closet in a buzzlightyear snuggie, so I can't judge,
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
I seriously think I may just have to live here. In this bed. Naked.
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
one nice thing about being home: no walks of shame, just drives of shame
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
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