Fyi I let myself into your place, I'm wearing some of your clothes in your bed. Come take them off
She got kicked off the plane and spent the last four hours in a holding cell with the feds.
but she's really nice
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
He like poked it twice with the tip of his tongue then left it alone. I'm sad.
How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Wait, how do girls masturbate?
I dunno we use shower heads I guess.
..how does it fit?
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
Because if not I was going to quote Ryan Lochte as punishment
Thank god I got my shit together
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
My Boss was giving porn recommendations. I think I'm scarred for life.
Randomize
