i met him on craigslist. and no i'm not a hooker.
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I'm guessing you saw the bathroom?
I am in the hospital with a broken wrist because a guy told me that if I punched him it "wouldn't hurt." it hurt. me. Thank you 11 jello shots.
These People Had Regrettable One Night Stands
I can't. He's too cute and my tongue is too long.
Sneezing blood is a good thing right? Medically speaking.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
No worries. On my way home to get ski poles and wipe the sick off my face. Then it's time to get drunk in the park
I'm drunk in a field. the chupacobra is going to eat me. if I die serve vodka at my funeral.
This Girl Makes Latte Art That’s Too Cute to Drink
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
He told me the hickey on the side if his neck was actually a "bruise" from hitting a bird on his motorcycle. I'm not sure what's more impressive, the fact people believed him due to the size of the mark or the fact you gave it to him.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
I DO have hobbies! I drink. I drink more. I catfish men on Grindr with photos of guys who are less attractive than me. I listen to Lovecraftian podcasts. I'm very well-rounded.
He screamed like a woman when he came then proceeded to sing "you [we] are the champion" by Queen. I think I'm in love.
I once took a shot of lighter fluid.. That's not a secret just a fucked up story