Don't EVER smell your tampon
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
look, i dont wanna be "that girl" but if someone offers me coke in exchange for sex, i cant say no.
Just saw ur booking photo. Love that u were already wearing orange. Its like u knew
We are taking shots off of spoons and listening to Mary Poppins.
No. Her boobs are the one spot of warmth in my life right now and I will not let you take them from me.
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
well his attempt to make a white russian with instant coffee, gone off milk, and that weird probably illegal vodka we bought the other day isnt going well
apparently while i was high i thought that putting a dinosaur temporary tattoo on my inner thigh would keep me from taking my pants off and having sex with him...
...it didn't...
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Nah, I was done when the Big Pun lookalike began to sob and tell me I looked like his ex...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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