I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
hes so high that he's convinced hes a duck. hes squating in the bathtub quacking. that was NOT JUST pot.
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
It was literally like being eaten out by a dog. That bad.
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
take 2 Ambien then drink a Red Bull and watch Alice in Wonderland. Trust me.
We convinced the Dj to let us play musical chairs...... I won by the way.
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
She's currently singing "I'm gonna keep on lovin you" to her pillow. How do you think tonight went?
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
not being a booty call is very strange. Who knew there was so much time for activities at night!
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
Randomize
