Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
They were so big her bra clasped in the front. Didn't even know those existed.
Just had a serious discussion with my ex-boyfriend about sexy nurse vs. sexy teacher. So score one for friendship I guess.
He posted a picture from Senor Frogs. I don't remember where that bikini came from and my sombrero is PERPENDICULAR. Safe to say it was one hell of a day
I told her I had a small penis. Then replied if Peter Pan won with a dagger then so can I
It's okay, big boobs are better than running.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
Dude, you ever snap awake on the toilet at work with that panicked, "How long have I been here?!" feeling??
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Randomize
