Would it be horrible to send my ex's girlfriend an email telling her that I sexed her man up so dirty that he fell asleep inside of me afterwards?
he was fingering the outside of my pants..i knew that was my cue to leave
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
Well regardless of where or with who you will be blacking out and i will be pouring shots down ur throat like a baby bird
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
He made me cum via FaceTime, then he made me look at his stock investment charts..
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I'm constantly crying, and now I start crying every time I masturbate which is a fun development.
Hungover on St. Patrick's Day. I did this backwards.
There's glitter all over his bed from my Pink VS panties... I think I might invest in similar styles as a way of marking my territory just incase.
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