You don't get off work for this? I feel genuinely bad for you.
I'll have a beer when I get into the office. Yes, I hide beer in my work frige.
fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
the Monday before Thanksgiving is not a Monday at all. Just Thursday in Monday suit.
One of my friends found 6 bags of gummy bears on the roof. He lives a building over. Apparently even hammered you still have quite an arm
He upper decked the toilet, got himself lit on fire 6 times and lit 4 other people on fire in the course of 3 days.
Yes, she did suck your dick in the bathroom to wake you up.
we hotboxed my bathroom. with nine people and two dogs.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
What kind of a birthday party isn't a get drunk and ruin everything party
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
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