We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
I just lit a candle in my room using axe and a lighter, that's how bored I am. Let's get schwasted.
IM TRYING TO BE RESPONSIBLE AND ALL I WANT TO DO IS FUNNEL CHEAP BEER AND SCREAM ABOUT HOW MUCH I LOVE OUR NATION
We all have to be good at something. Mine are writing, drinking, fucking and peer pressure.
You said you couldn't look at me because you would have to take off your sunglasses but you can't because they're the "guides to your eyes".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
I've never been so excited to be bleeding from my vagina.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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