your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
I just worked out and used handles of vodka as weights. Whoever said alcoholism is detrimental to you health obviously has no fucking idea.
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
I feel like Jeremy snapchattong while we're fucking is a perfect example of our generation..
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
Of course he's seen my tits, I wave those things around like a trump supporter does an American flag
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
Randomize
