This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
i just uploaded three hundred pictures and you had your shirt off in two hundred and ninety of them
the remaining ten - you weren't in
my little brother just told me that I should start chasing my vodka with slim fast. genious.
There's a naked kid on the floor on your side of the bed. Don't freak out when you wake up. I think we need to fix the lock on the door...
He sent me a pic and IT CURVED OUT OF THE PICTURE! Curved. Out. Of. The. Picture.
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
I don't think the car's salesman understands that I am about to vomit on him.
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
Possibly threw up in my purse last night. Still suspicious of of all actions
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
He told me he wished he could shrink down to a small size so he could live inside my cleavage
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Randomize
