Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
Today's work quote "if I looked like you, I'd be sitting on everyones face"
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
We are there now. They have a giant cock and balls with an eagles face and wings.
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
lets go to sea world and you can just hit on every guy in a wetsuit until you get lucky
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
I'm still drunk, my mom is throwing up, and there is a random Irish guy out getting our house breakfast right now. Wednesday's are my bitch.
Please don't give away my fajitas
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize
