If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
I just found out my college boyfriend's nickname is actually a Dutch word for little cucumber.....it all makes sense now.
currently taking a solo cab to the strip club at 1 in the morning. this is healthy.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Just set up my first threesome: a rapper and a Marine. Pretty sure at least 80% of girls in America hate me right now.
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I am now picking what guy I will hang out with based on how many Pokémon they live near.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
