i think i would be perfectly content if, on my deathbed, i could look back on a life that didn't have any fisting in it
FYI-Owning a kitty significantly lowers your chances of ever seeing mine...
love makes seman taste better
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Underwear, t-shirt, bottle of Pinot Grigio and Golden Girls. I've hit a new level of homosexual.
Awkward moment: seeing and saying hey to the MILF you're sleeping with while shopping with your mother and sister.
Ugh he's so pretty though. He bit my face at the bar because I tried to steal his ID and I forgave him
I feel as bad as you right now. I'm about to use one girls car to go see another one
Fuck ya. But normally I drove one girls car picking up a different girl while texting another girl lol
These cutoffs are too tight but my ass looks like Freedom
I changed his contact info to "NO" and a picture of satan
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
This is my life. Currently ordering a gift for my straight married girlfriend's husband from my lesbian married girlfriend.
Randomize
