Hey sorry i havent responded. i threw up on my phone while i was sleeping
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
she gave me head while i watched the '98 Rose Bowl on espn classic. Ryan Leaf really was a huge bust
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
Adulthood is weird i just cleared a check larger than my gross income from 2011 but i also just did coke during my lunch break
WE HAVE TO LEAVE. I HAVE HAD SEX WITH WAY TOO MANY PEOPLE IN THIS BUS STATION.
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
Alone, in the dark, eating tacos and drinking vodka. Who's apartment is this?
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