I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
i DID try to find you last night. i asked where you were and you texted me the letter "e" and a picture of the dark.
I came home to my brother stoned out of his mind. He got a high score on COD and asked me to have a celebration yogurt with him.
she was rubbing her elbow against the fish tank and laughing hysterically then she said I'M THEIR FISHY GOD and watched harry potter
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
words I never want to hear dad say again: "Trevor you sexy man you"
Bar selfie Saturday turned into bar nudie Saturday in a hurry. I need to delete my snapchat...
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
I no longer need a flask. I need a canteen.
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
You just kinda wondered into the street and started screaming at dogs and small children...
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
Randomize
