If lil wayne asked you to lick him like a lollipop I feel that you would willingly oblige.
Unfortunately I think I would lick most anyone's lollipop.
It's your form of community service; servicing the greater SDSU area.
Apparently throwing up on your own cape is still a party foul
All he said was "Yeah, there's a lot of air down there. And penis."
I want to wear something that says I'm a lady (but I have condoms!)
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
hey remember that mom you brought home from the bar last month... she is currently driving me back to her place. turning my phone off now.
I smell like hot dogs and captain morgan it's 11:20 am what is my life
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
We had sex with a sexual harassment video playing in the background before his gf got there. I've hit a new low
Oh man. I am high, watching The Office and getting pancakes. What a country.
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
Randomize
