just fell over trying to sit on the toliet like a robot.
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
What I dont get, is for a man with a penis his size, to choose to go back with another girl instead of one that he says is the best sex he's ever had. He cant afford to be picky.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
If you're wondering why you have playpen balls it's because we stopped at chuckie cheese on the way home.
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Worrying about "What smells like cat pee?" is so much easier than worrying about "What am I doing with my life?"
I'm so glad we both made out with him though. I feel like that really brought us together
So when's a good time this week to show up at your apartment in nothing but a trench coat and a bow? Y'know. Hypothetically.
He asked me what I wanted for Christmas. I told him an orgasm would be nice.
Also, let me tell you how embarrassing it is to match with someone who seemingly has their shit together at 4:45AM on a Thursday.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
The career specialist read an Onion article to us. Please send help.
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