I an trashes at a wedding. Hotbcousins here I come. Agh.
I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
he pushed my hair back because he said it made me look like kelly kapowski and he told me to call him zach
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
New channing tatum movie.
I'll bring my vibrator.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well see how he likes it when I randomly start crying and saying my dads name during sex I WILL RUIN ALL HIS FUTURE BONERS
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
LOOK, I was 19, and I made a lot of choices with my crotch which I'm weirdly proud of
Yes dear.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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