i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
My mom is such a hoarder. I found a deer candelabrum last night, it had antlers has candle holders. It was like a redneck menorah.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
no one could get around him on the stairs cause he surrounded himself with all the empties he could find, he said he was building a fort. then he passed out on them.
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
Legitimately sent a work email with "Hey, you kids, get off my lawn" as the subject line.
Jesus Christ. If I were a normal sex-having person, I'd think I was knocked up. I'm cycling through emotions like I'm in a decathlon to crazy.
6 pack came off in the shower. Sharpie is not forever.
I have to masturbate tonight while watching every Paul Walker movie ever made. It's what he would have wanted. RIP Paul.
If I win the lottery I'm going to hire someone to skywrite "FUCKTARD" over his house. That much anger.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
You went outside, peed in the front yard, and asked me to bring you some toilet paper.
Randomize
