How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
she is unbelievable! ever pee on a girl?
not while she was awake
Taking the airport shuttle drunk should not happen this often in my life.
I'm drunk enough to talk Barbara Walters outta her panties
Missing a small section of hand. Hope your night is going better
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
Using a miniature baseball bat to kill a mosquito in the house may not have been the most efficient or safest way, but that thing is fucking dead. However, so are three wine glasses, a lamp, and my baseball bat privileges. Worth it.
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
no joke- she just sprinkled parmesan cheese into her champagne and slurred "I just need a little snack"
Just try not to burn your pubes off with sparklers this year.
No promises
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
It's not as funny as it sounds. I shit myself at the company Christmas party.
I just woke up, its 6AM and i'm pretty sure the guy passed out next to me is 70% ugly...
I didn’t want a minivan, but I have to admit it’s made it a lot easier to hook up with the dilfs at soccer tournaments
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