When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
my orientation roommate looks just like New York of Flavor Flav fame
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
This guy at the party just introduced himself to me as "the guy who sat behind you on a plane last year"
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
You tried to luge a beer down a flip flop.
Omg do you remember last night you kept pointing to your vag asking who wants to play this like a fiddle hahaha
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
Note to self...boner negates all verbal agreements ...got it
All of my exes are either overweight and neckbearded or dead. Someone out there is looking out for me.
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Our son just found our secret Sex Dungeon that is no longer hidden in our basement. He brought his Xbox and the TV down there he is currently sitting in the sex swing playing video games. What do I do?
Randomize