Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
Things overheard in WeHo: "Just drink a corona and eat some ass, you won't be hungry anymore"
I'm so cold I just used my boobs to keep my face warm
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
Apparently I promised a worker at La Siesta free English lessons to make up for vomming all over the little Mariachi band.
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
We spent a good 10 minutes in the morning looking for my clothes. I ended up taking the bus home in my 6inch heels and his baggy t-shirt. The bus was filled with kids... one of them whistled at me.
yeah the little voice in my head screaming YOU NEED TO GET LAID eventually grew legs and started kicking me so to avoid brain damage i had to fuck him
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
All I have are vague memories of us eating ham?
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
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