I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
When you get home we need to compare our schedules and set up masturbation slots. I'm scares of you walking in on me. Again.
Needless to say they were not happy to find out that we braided their hair together, when one of them woke up needing to puke bad
and you will have a crown and it will be made of penises and all will bow before you and your glorious penis crown
You stumbled in the house, mumbled something about a cheese party, grabbed a block of cheese and the whiskey, and left.
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
I just realized I donated our bong to goodwill.. RIP Kimbo Slice
You suck, She hit so hard.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
we should start a freak-out-the-cashier-contest. I just bought JerseyShore Season2, red high heels, and nipple soothing pads
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Randomize
