We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
How do I introduce myself to her without coming off as "the guy who jacks-off to her profile pic"?
You know what is really helpful - when the two guys you want to fuck stand next to each other. Stay tuned for who wins
I'm questioning the dried chocolate syrup on my tits.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
Im sitting in church with a backpack full of beer bottles. This is friendship.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
Look if 10 am was too early to go barrel tasting the winery would not be open.
I'm a gymnast. they should know better than to let me get dunk near anything i can flip on
I vaguely remember a pregnant lady reaching for my penis. When was I in an elevator?
Fine line between drunken accidental sleepover with your best friend's lab partner and gay sexathon. I did a cartwheel over that line. A CARTWHEEL THAT LANDED IN HIS LAP
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I think he's only dating me for my ass...
Walked into the bathroom and saw a Minion eating out Harley Quinn so this Halloween will be hard to top.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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