Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
So I'm eating my sandwich... and a penny fell out of it.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
I have a hunch Mama J got around.
Am I allowed to say that about my own mom?
Being single/not living at home sucks. All I want is someone I can force to pick up my pizza for me so I don't have to talk to anyone.
Youre having a picnic
Yeah but all we have is vodka, so it's getting a bit out of hand.
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
But for real though. That weed tastes like the jolly laughter of Santa Claus.
Randomize
