God I can't wait to have my phone textbombed every night
She said as long as i don't wake her up she doesn't care what hole i use.
Got yourself a keeper right there.
If one more person calls me a lesbian I am going to have to give you head in public.
Now I know how you felt every time you had to listen to me have sex with a girl... mildly disguested yet marginally proud.
ride him like a prized pony all the way to orgasm town.
Is it possible to get a DUI in a wheelchair that's not yours?
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I just saw a dude sitting IN a bush, weeping and playing a harmonica. I hope your day is going better than his.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
He held back my hair as I puked, then kindly asked me to slightly move my head over and pissed right next to my face.
Not remembering where I left my grinder before vacation #stonerproblems
he keeps various drugs in his kitchen cupboard like groceries. that is my new life goal as an adult.
holy shit I was not prepared for her to whip out that dildo
he drove over two hours to fuck me and came in 3 minutes. he got mad when I asked him if it was worth it...
A condom was pulled out of your vagina by a doctor today I do not think you can pull off "closet" hoe anymore
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