Godddamnit i jsu woke up in oharee. My connecxtion left an hro ago. Thosse flight atttendants can DRinK
Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Haha dude youd die if you were here. Girl presenting is defending the new testament and did her report on JESUS. best believe i'm gonna ask some hungover, atheist ass questions
I think a homeless person took a bath in my mouth while I was sleeping :(
I need to surround myself with more reliable stoners...
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
She just sat there, all alone, with a bottle of booze. And the dog. He even looked like he didn't wanna be there with her.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
His pick-up lines are quotes from Doctor Who. Of course I fucked him.
First poop in my apartment for the summer, officially settled in. :)
You know you've been on Tinder too long when you're the guy cropped out of the profile pic. Of a woman you're still seeing...
I just saw puke on the road at the same stoplight i threw up at sunday morning! Makes me smile inside.
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