i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
and lets be real... who can blow a middle school class's sunday school teacher and keep a straight face ever again? NOBODY.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I woke up hugging a box of cheerios that had "wonder woman" written in sharpie on it. So much for a sober night.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Quick, I need a picture of your dick. Don't ask questions, just show me your genitals.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
he told me he liked me . I thought we were just fuck buddies . This ruins everything!
He was like 120 lbs and 20 of that was penis
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
Randomize
