I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
Every time I remember you're bi, the world gets a little brighter.
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
You found me in the back room alone eating someone else's whole birthday cake with my hands then asked me if you could join.
I just finished spraying the foam party off my pumps with a garden hose
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Apparently "dick me" was not the response he was looking for.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
he asked if he should bring the trash can into the room.. apparently i shoved my finger all over his face and said.. shhhh dont talk... just take your pants off.
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
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