weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
Just fucked a hooker at a motel in New Jersey. Two states down, 48 to go.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
It's official. 2011 is the year of sport fucking
i've been lying on top of my bed for the past 20 minutes
i'm about to blow half an adderall though and try to rally
After i finished him. He goes "youre a champion"... Then whispers "forever"
I'm watching my cat lick a used condom wrapper on my nightstand and I'm too hungover to move and do anything about it. Tequila Tuesdays can not be a thing.
Being with her was like shitty sexual fear factor big ass sausage nipples over sized outty belly button i was scared and drunk tell know one
we received free cupcakes at the first bar, and then I at the second bar i hooked up with a fat chick from Cincinnati on the patio.
you win some, you lose some.
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
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